Today I am interviewing Bud Mushroom. Because Bud doesn’t like to speak, he has been allowed to type his answers, but due to his size, he is jumping all over the keyboard like an excited grasshopper.
Anyway. To the interview.
CCN: Hey, Bud. Why don’t you tell everyone your name?
BUD: Hi! My name is Bud Mushroom. You can call me Bud. That is because it is my name.
CCN: Ok, thanks Bud. Where do you live and what is your job?
BUD: I live in Twinkle Dingle. That is because it is my home. This is my Job: I am a Useful Fairy.
CCN: What exactly is a Useful Fairy?
BUD: I do Useful Things!
BUD: I like to be Useful!
CCN: Moving along, how old are you Bud?
BUD: I am a Growed-Up.
CCN: How does that translate to Human Years?
BUD: (Bud never answered – he scratched his head, then frowned, and finally shrugged).
CCN: Tell me about your home.
BUD: I live in a dead log! Mold and slime grow on the outside. Bugs and worms live there! I have a pile of dead leaves in my house!
CCN: It sounds … lovely, Bud.
BUD: I love my house. I live there. This is why: it is my home.
CCN: Just one more quick question, Bud. WHY AREN’T YOU WEARING ANY CLOTHING??
BUD: I do not like clothing! I do not like the way it feels. I do not like how hot I get! It is itchy and makes me droop!
CCN: I guess that explains …
BUD: Sometimes I have to cover my Bare Bottom, because when there is an Important Occasion, it just Will Not Do to Have a Bare Bottom. One time, Pixies made me wear TROUSERS! I do not like Trousers.
CCN: I get the idea, Bud, now …
BUD: Once I had a skirt made out of Beetle Wings. When I was done with it, I dropped it into the Pond. Then I laughed.
CCN: That’s all the time we have, Bud. Is there any last thing you want to add?
BUD: Goodbye from Bud Mushroom!
Bud can be found in Don’t Piss Off The Fairies, Fairy CrossingS, Bud Mushroom and the Nefarious Trousers (the e-book is FREE on Smashwords), and he jumps his own blog. He also has his own collection of merchandise in the Twinkle Dingle Zazzle shop.